Silly Goose Flies Away!

To the illustrator: I don't know what your usual author notes look like, but his is how me and Don Julio did it: Caption, then my notes on what needs to be in the drawing. Basic story is a goose wants to fly, so he goes into an airport. There he takes a plane and is downed by the military. Easy peasy, hope you brought your red pen (I'm not hiring a colorist, figure it out).

Caption: Look at Silly Goose sitting in a pond!

Illustrator notes: I don't give a fuck what this looks like. Goose. Water. What the fuck ever. Just make the goose like one of those Canadian "sure means well" looking things, not like the little bastards that used to hiss at me when I was a kid.

Silly Goose is all alone!

I dunno, copy the last and throw some other geese in the background. Mean girl geese. Not like in pink with blond hair, but just looking at Silly so you know they're talking shit.

Silly Goose, where are you going?

Get the fucking goose out of the water walking. Sandy beach, rocky shoreline, as long as it looks like a fucking goose leaving the water.

Silly Goose has decided to fly!

Flap the fucker's wings. Blank white behind him, whatever non-water shit you decided. No fucks given except for wings in motion.

Flapping his wings makes Silly Goose tired!

No idea what a tired goose looks like. Do whatever the fuck you want, just don't make it look like the bastard had too many tequila shots and now has the spray shits. Tired, not sick, I'm saying.

Silly Goose, you can't go to the airport!

I want this goose in front of a gate with a guard in a uniform and weapon drawn. Don't make the goose shit, but make him look like he's back away slowly. The guard better be ready to send this goose to hell at the slightest honk, but he has handcuffs outstretched like that could bring him peace.

Silly Goose always finds a way!

Time to unleash the beast. Two page spread. Don't draw the normal flapping at the guard goose attack. Everyone has see that shit. I want the goose biting at this guy's crotch while he screams in pain and fires off shots into the ceiling. Dick biting and then tearing out his throat. Better yet, guard bloody on the ground with chunks taken out while the goose walks away carrying the guard's weapon with handcuffs on his side. Bloody goose prints following.

Silly Goose makes a friend!

Silly has the weapon trained on a pilot or a flight attendant, I don't care. Somebody who can fly a plane. Make them hot, too. Like sexy, but not scared. Like sassy, like the audience thinks that maybe Silly and them have a chance. I'm gonna call them Pilot, but make them whoever.

Silly Goose finds a plane!

Quick image of Silly leading Pilot along the tarmac to a hanger. There's a mechanic in overalls, they don't have to be sexy but maybe. They'll be dead soon anyway.

Don't stand between Silly Goose and flying!

Silly and Pilot standing at one end. The weapon has smoke coming off it. The mechanic is falling, fucking dead with a hole in his face. Not like his forehead like every other Sopranos bullshit head shot, but below the eye so it shatters the skull a little. Like his front is dented while this giant blood spray covers the rear of the plane. Pilot maybe is into it.

Away Silly Goose goes!

Another two page spread of plane taking off. Make it a small plane, like one of those jets rich guys take to islands where they fuck geese. Pilot and Silly are in the window up front, weapon still in Pilot's face but maybe you think it doesn't have to be there. Silly all business. Swarms of security and cops are below them firing at the plane.

Silly Goose enjoys the blue sky!

Silly has the gun in his lap, staring at the sky. Pilot is next to him, staring, something's there. Maybe put a far off hint of geese in the distance, like a shadow in a cloud or something. Peaceful though, like nothing could go wrong.

Silly Goose sees his pond friends!

It's those mean girl fuckers from before. I don't know how you drew them. Same shit, but flying in a V formation. Silly looks angry, wings on the stick and the gun falling to the floor.
Silly Goose takes his revenge on all the dumbasses who made him feel small!

Just a plane tearing through the V. Goose guts abound.

Silly Goose missed one!

One terrified little mean girl goose shitting itself midflight while trying to hide in the cloud. Silly sees it, though, coming around to take it out. He's pissed. Pilot is looking both paniced and very horny.

Oh No, Silly Goose, Bug out!

I don't know how you want to do this, so I'll give you what's happening and some options: Silly is almost about to kill that fucking mean girl goose that would not let him sit at the table in 6th grade because his shoes were "too poor" whatever the fuck that means, but a fighter jet beats him too it. Exploded mean girl goose, Silly looking surprised, Pilot is excited. Maybe inside the cockpit, seeing it explode or a long shot with everything in view, but that might not get the sexy look on Pilot's face.

Fly, Silly Goose, Fly!

Gimme a page or two of the two planes flying. Loop de loops, however the fuck you spell that. Show a mountain in the distance.

Silly Goose decides to try something he saw in a movie

I'll be honest, unless you have better ideas, let's just steal that last scene from Top Gun: Maverick. Close flying to the mountain, pulling up and inverted. The fighter jet blows up against the mountain. Big explosion.

Silly Goose celebrates with Pilot!

Make'em kiss.But have Pilot hold the gun.

Pilot turns out not to be Silly Goose's friend after all!

Pilot pulls the gun and holds it on Silly Goose. They walk to the back of the plane, rich shit all around. Like those seats that spin. Fuck I always wanted to ride on one of those. Pilot's hair is all sexy as shit, and they know what they are doing is wrong. Silly Goose has wings open, like saying, we can get past this and shit.

Silly Goose gets away!

This can be over multiple pages. Silly handcuffs (you've been drawing the handcuffs on his side that he took off the guard, right?) Pilot to one of the seats and knocks the gun away. Then Silly opens the plane's door and flies out. 

Silly Goose glides back to the pond to enjoy his day.

Nice peaceful shot of Silly landing in the blood soaked water. Make the goose look satisfied. Maybe put some plane and goose chunks around. In the distance have the plane sending that cheating bastard Pilot to hell by crashing in an orange fireball.

This should be about 25-30 pages depending on how apeshit you went on planes flying around. We're contracted for 30 pages, so put some sketches or whatever dumb shit you drawers do to fill space.

And thanks, you're the best.