Sometimes the perfect candidate comes through the door. They fit. They fit the description of the job. The education requirements. The experience. References that would make you slap your director. The pants interview is the only hurdle.

For those not aware, a pants interview is when you are so impressed with someone on paper that you decide to meet them to make sure they wear pants. Or whatever appropriate clothing covers their bathroom bits. Because people can be great on paper and complete psychos in person.

One time, long ago, I hired someone to drive our bookmobile. Former driver at Greyhound for twenty years, CDL on hand, and just a really nice guy on the phone. Hired him right away to come in part time and drive around the children's librarian on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and every other Saturday. He showed up with a parrot who screamed "Ain't no barb like Barbara's hooks in me" at random intervals. On his first day out, the parrot attacked the children's librarian while they were on route to the Children's Daylily School.

She quit, and he was let go.

So today we have our third interview, the last applicant, and this is a true pants interview.

No pants, but a lovely floral skirt with a white top and a cardigan over. She was five minutes early and read to a small child while waiting. She did voices. The circulation librarian and I watched and waited for them to finish.

Circ said, "Jesus, are cartoon deer gonna come out of the stacks so she can feed them by hand?"

"I think we found her," I said.

"Got her MLIS at University of Michigan. Was in the Peace Corps for two years. Ran the children's library at St. Anthony of Padua Children's Hospital. Started a reading program for blind… I can't tell if I'm impressed or gonna vomit."

"She's the one."

Circ raised an eyebrow. "Then why the hell does she want us?"

In the interview, Circ repeated her question.

Three said, "Well, I think something called me here. I'm not very religious, kind of a student of all faiths, but I believe in a guiding force that calls us to action."

"So you read our job placement in the penny saver and came on down?" Circ said.

Three said, "I think it was on the state commission website."

"What she means is, what makes you want to be a children's librarian?" I said trying not to blow the one good thing to happen all week.

Three took a breath, then smiled. "I just love helping kids find what makes them special. All kids are special and deserve to find that right thing, you know? What makes them light up like a lightning bug. That thing that will attract others to them, not because of what they have but because they deserve love and happiness."

"Bless your heart," Circ said.

I almost kicked Circ under the table. The interview kept on going, two, three, then all six questions. By the end even Circ warmed. Three had the job before she walked in, but by the end I was doubting if I was capable enough to be a librarian.

We walked her to the door. I found myself struggling not to wave goodbye as she walked down the sidewalk. She stopped to smell a flower blooming through a crack.

"She's gonna do great here," I said.

Circ said, "She's gonna do great when she quits this place in two years. We never did ask why she was unemployed."

Three reached the corner and stepped into the street. At that moment a bus came rolling around the corner. Three let out a small scream we could hear just over the sound of the air brakes and tires sliding over hot asphalt.

"Oh my god," Circ said.

I sighed. "Call the ambulance. Then call Two and tell them they got the job."

I opened the door and stepped out just in time to see the bus driver leaving his seat. The parrot on his shoulder screamed, "Ain't no barb like Barbara's hooks in me."