What happened to the cast of Home Improvement?
In the great year of nineteen hundred and ninety whatever, a little show called Home "Tool Time" Improvement graced our screens. It starred Timchael "Tim" Allen as a bumbling dad to three boys, husband to a grunt-hating wife, and some creeper in the backyard they kept behind a fence. What happened to all these people once the show ended? Let's find out.
Timchael "Tim" Allen
Tim kept on grunting his way into history by going to space. He had an adventure wherein he crash landed with his colony onto a planet. Desperate to get off, Tim tried to have sex with a cat, but it was a robot. Frustrated, Tim traveled in time to the point where everyone became assholes, including himself. Accepting his fate on this planet of assholes, he went on to act with Alan Rickman and Signorey Weaver to fight more aliens. They made a toy from him voiced by Chris Evans, who played Captain Britain, in the movie Up.
Patricia "Patio Pat" Taylor
Patricia ran like hell from the set of Tool Time to a great career as a lawn chair salesperson. Patricia formed a new kind of lawn chair company that exclusively deals with the terminally ill on a rental basis. Billions of dollars later, she took the name Patio Pat and stays out of the public eye. Rumor has it that she found love with an Australian named Bongo and they live on her yacht. Recently she fist-fought Captain Britain to a standstill in the newest Marvel movie, Avenging Your Mom.
Brad, The Oldest Son
The most active of the three boys, Brad has found himself playing multiple unlikeable douchebags in movies like Rage: Carry 2 Furious and some other shit. The level of "hey, it's Brad" has reached such levels that his personality has been replaced by two things: a certain "that smells" look and open disdain for Oreo cookies. We have no idea what any of that means.
Jay TeeTee, the Middle One
Remember floppy hair? Man, that hair was floppy, and he was so snarky! He now lives in northern California eating granola and talking about how much he loves his craft beer business. Mostly it hides an alcohol problem that really hides a miniature problem. People say, "When's Jay gonna make another movie and stop talking about beer?" Then other people say "I think he's got a drinking problem." And then yet more people say, "That's all bullshit. He's been building a model of the Home Improvement house to perfect scale. It's impressive." And you know what? We bet it is.
Mark, The Last One
To be honest, we heard this kid had problems. Like, twenty bucks tip, and he will get you extra hot sauce and stop for beer. That's right, he owns the rideshare company Beer Me, the only company that will stop and get you whatever, but only if you're cool. Are you cool? Bajillionaire.
Wilson
Sadly, Wilson passed away just after the show ended. In his will, he asked that his head be frozen. We do not know what the ultimate plan here was, but it could not have been good. His family decided the man's head should become a volleyball to honor his love of the sport. Even more sadly, it was lost when a FedEx shipment plane crashed. But! Tom Hanx was there, and they hung out for a while until Tom went for a swim, and Wilson's head floated away. The last time anyone saw the head volleyball, it was floating across Spanish waters, a shark fin close behind.